Bereavement Leave and Mourning in Japan: How Many Degrees of Kinship? Days Off by Relationship and Who Mourning Postcards Cover
When a relative dies, the first questions are usually "Can I take bereavement leave, and for how many days?" and "Should I send mourning postcards this year?" Neither is fixed uniformly by law in Japan. They depend on company rules and custom, but in most cases the scope is drawn by degree of kinship. This article covers bereavement leave days by relationship based on the rules for national public servants (National Personnel Authority Rule), typical days at private companies, how the days are counted, who mourning postcards (mochū hagaki) cover and for how long, and how to think about confusing relationships such as cousins, in-law grandparents and uncles and aunts.
Bereavement leave is a company rule, not a legal requirement
Bereavement leave (kibiki kyūka) is leave you can take for the funeral and paperwork when a relative dies. Unlike annual paid leave, it isn't set by the Labor Standards Act. It's one of the "special leaves" a company sets in its work rules. So which relationships qualify, how many days you get, and whether it's paid all differ by company.
Many companies follow the rules for national public servants (National Personnel Authority Rule 15-14) and cover relatives up to the 2nd or 3rd degree. First check your company's work rules or congratulations-and-condolences rules, and if it isn't written there, asking HR or general affairs is the sure way. For schools too, the number of bereavement days not counted as absence is decided by each school.
Bereavement leave days by relationship: public servant rules and typical company days
For national public servants, bereavement leave days are set for each relationship in Appended Table 2 of National Personnel Authority Rule 15-14. Private company days vary, but here are the ranges commonly seen.
| Deceased | Degree | National public servants | Common at private companies |
|---|---|---|---|
| Spouse | — | 7 days | 5–10 days |
| Parent | 1st degree | 7 days | 5–7 days |
| Child | 1st degree | 5 days | 5–7 days |
| Grandparent | 2nd degree | 3 days (7 days if you inherit by representation and take over ritual items, etc.) | 2–3 days |
| Sibling | 2nd degree | 3 days | 2–3 days |
| Grandchild | 2nd degree | 1 day | 1–2 days |
| Uncle or aunt | 3rd degree | 1 day (7 days if you inherit by representation and take over ritual items, etc.) | 1 day or not covered |
| Spouse's parent, parent's spouse | 1st degree (in-law) | 3 days (7 days if you shared a household) | 3–5 days |
| Child's spouse, spouse's child | 1st degree (in-law) | 1 day (5 days if you shared a household) | 1–2 days |
| Spouse's grandparent, grandparent's spouse | 2nd degree (in-law) | 1 day (3 days if you shared a household) | 1 day or not covered |
| Spouse's sibling, sibling's spouse | 2nd degree (in-law) | 1 day (3 days if you shared a household) | 1 day or not covered |
| Spouse of an uncle or aunt | 3rd degree (in-law) | 1 day | Often not covered |
Relationships not in the table, such as cousins, great-grandparents, nephews and nieces, and great-grandchildren, aren't covered by bereavement leave for national public servants. They're often not covered at private companies either, and people usually use annual paid leave to attend the funeral. "Shared a household" refers to cases such as living together and sharing household finances.
How bereavement days are counted, and what to tell your company
- When counting starts: usually from the day of death or the day after. Even if the wake and funeral are several days later, the start day follows the rules, so talk to your company early once the schedule is set.
- Whether weekends and public holidays count: bereavement leave for national public servants is a run of consecutive days, including any holidays in between. Private companies may either include holidays or count business days only, so check the rules.
- Paid or unpaid: many companies treat it as paid special leave, but some don't pay. If it's unpaid, you may be able to choose to use annual paid leave instead.
- Proof: some companies ask for documents showing the funeral took place, such as the funeral thank-you card or a copy of the death certificate. Keep the thank-you card rather than throwing it away.
When contacting your company, give your relationship to the deceased (such as "my wife's grandmother" or "my father's older brother"), the degree of kinship, the wake and funeral schedule, and how many days you plan to take off. For in-laws, whether you're covered depends on the degree of the in-law relationship, so state the relationship precisely. How to count degrees of kinship is explained in How to count degrees of kinship, with a chart, and in-laws in What are in-laws? Degrees for brothers- and sisters-in-law.
Mourning postcards usually cover your spouse and relatives up to the 2nd degree
There's no legal rule either for who to send mourning postcards (nenga ketsureijō, notices that you won't send New Year cards) for, but generally they're sent when your spouse or a relative up to the 2nd degree has died. The 2nd degree includes in-laws such as your spouse's parents, grandparents and siblings.
| Deceased | Degree | Mourning postcards |
|---|---|---|
| Spouse, parent, child | —/1st degree | Usually sent |
| Spouse's parent | 1st degree (in-law) | Usually sent |
| Grandparent, sibling, grandchild | 2nd degree | Usually sent (some don't for grandparents they didn't live with) |
| Spouse's grandparent or sibling | 2nd degree (in-law) | Opinions are divided |
| Uncle or aunt, nephew or niece, great-grandparent | 3rd degree | Usually not sent (sometimes sent if you lived together or were close) |
| Cousin | 4th degree | Usually not sent |
More people now decide based on whether they lived together and how close they were. If a couple sends New Year cards under both names, the usual practice is to send joint mourning postcards when either spouse loses a relative within the 2nd degree, though some split by recipient, for example still sending individual New Year cards to work contacts.
How long mourning lasts, and when to send mourning postcards
- Mourning period: generally one year from the death (until the first anniversary). As a remnant of the old mourning regulations, there's a custom of treating closer relatives such as parents as longer.
- When to send: so they arrive between mid-November and early December, before recipients start preparing New Year cards.
- If the death is in December: if mourning postcards won't be in time, don't send New Year cards, and instead send a midwinter greeting (kanchū mimai) after the New Year period (around January 7) to explain.
- If you receive New Year cards while in mourning: reply with a midwinter greeting rather than a New Year card.
Even in mourning, receiving New Year cards and going out for things other than the first shrine visit of the year are considered fine. The common view is to refrain from New Year visits to Shinto shrines, while visiting Buddhist temples is no problem.
How to think about confusing relationships
- Cousins: 4th-degree blood relatives, almost always outside both bereavement leave and mourning postcards. Use paid leave to attend the funeral.
- In-law grandparents (your spouse's grandparents): 2nd-degree in-laws. Bereavement leave for national public servants is 1 day (3 days if you shared a household). Families differ on mourning postcards, for example sending them if the couple sends joint cards, or not if they didn't live together.
- Uncles and aunts: 3rd-degree blood relatives. Bereavement leave for national public servants is 1 day. Mourning postcards usually aren't sent. The kanji distinction between 伯父 and 叔父 (older and younger uncle) is in The difference between 伯父 and 叔父.
- Older brother's wife, older sister's husband: 2nd-degree in-laws. Bereavement leave for national public servants is 1 day (3 days if you shared a household).
- Second cousins and first cousins once removed: 5th to 6th-degree blood relatives, outside both bereavement leave and mourning postcards (for their degrees, see Second cousins vs cousins once removed).
If you know the relationship but aren't sure of the degree, try the Kinship Degree & Relationship Calculator, tapping step by step from yourself, as in wife → mother → mother (your wife's grandmother). Along with the degree and whether it's a blood or in-law relationship, it shows the bereavement leave days for national public servants and whether the person falls within the usual range for mourning postcards.
FAQ
- Up to what degree of kinship can I take bereavement leave?
- It's set by your company's work rules, usually up to the 2nd or 3rd degree. For national public servants, it covers your spouse, parents, children, grandparents, siblings, grandchildren, uncles and aunts, your spouse's parents, grandparents and siblings, and the spouses of your children, siblings, uncles and aunts. Cousins and great-grandparents aren't covered.
- Can I take bereavement leave for a cousin's funeral?
- At most companies, no. A cousin is a 4th-degree blood relative and isn't covered by bereavement leave for national public servants either. People usually use annual paid leave to attend. Some companies do cover cousins, so check your work rules.
- How many days of bereavement leave for a grandparent?
- For national public servants, 3 days, or 7 if you inherit by representation and take over ritual items. Private companies commonly give 2 to 3 days. For your spouse's grandparent, national public servants get 1 day (3 days if you shared a household).
- Up to what degree do I send mourning postcards?
- Generally your spouse and relatives up to the 2nd degree: parents, children, grandparents, siblings and grandchildren, plus your spouse's parents, grandparents and siblings. For 3rd-degree uncles and aunts or cousins they usually aren't sent, though some people do if they lived together or were close.
- Do weekends count toward bereavement leave days?
- For national public servants, bereavement leave is a run of consecutive days, including weekends and public holidays in between. Private companies may either include holidays or count business days only, so check your work rules.
Tools in this article
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